Hi, friends! I’m back from vacation and wow a lot of scary stuff happened since my last post. At the end, I’ll wrap with a few serious thoughts as we carry the weight together. But I know you don’t come here for the heavy news, so for the most part we’ll do what we’re here to do and enjoy pop culture. 💜
Deep breaths.
Despite everything else going on in the world, March has arrived to tell us: “NYC IS BACK, BABY!”
Mask mandates are out (sort of), shows are in, and tourism is up. Despite the impending sense of nuclear doom, New Yorkers and tourists alike are out here fighting for seats on the subway and enjoying Fake Spring No. 2!
This week, I had the pleasure of going IN REAL LIFE to see:
Hasan Minhaj at Radio City Music Hall, performing his new standup, “The King’s Jester.” Phenomenal! Since this show isn’t streaming yet, I highly recommend his first stand-up special, Homecoming King on Netflix.
Music Man on Broadway in which, depending on which review you read, Hugh Jackman either singlehandedly saves or spoils the classic remake! [I say he does neither! He cannot sing anymore but he is Hugh Jackman!]
The Batman at my favorite NYC theater where one escalator is always inexplicably not working. There’s nothing like watching a Batman movie to make you feel like NYC is doing fine! After all, I have not been recently attacked by a man with duct tape for a head!
Christian Bale may still be my favorite version of Batman, but Robert Pattinson is my new favorite version of Bruce Wayne, Emo Rich Boy™. He plays the character like Gossip Girl’s Chuck Bass if Chuck Bass turned his mommy issues into a mania for justice and expensive vigilante equipment.
Finally, two questions for the filmmakers: 1) Why is this movie three hours long, it is so unnecessary and I almost peed myself. 2) Why can’t you just let Catwoman be openly lesbian!?? Mkay, that’s all.
What did y’all think? Are you going to see it? Are you, too, confused by Andy Serkis as Alfred?
OK, on to this week’s topics — we’ll hit the fun stuff first and finish with more about Oscar noms!
In the News
Queen Elizabeth got Covid but it appears she has recovered! My favorite part though is the insane headline by “news” “source” Hollywood Unlocked: Fact Check: 10 Reasons We Believed Queen Elizabeth Was Dead, in which they defend themselves for mistakenly reporting her death, and blame an intern.
America is getting its own Eurovision and I don’t know whether to be excited or embarrassed! Artists from all 50 states will compete, including Michael Bolton for Connecticut, Jewel for Alaska, and Macy Gray for Ohio! In case you thought this couldn’t get any weirder and/or better: Snoop Dogg and Kelly Clarkson will host!
Jelly Beans are dropping a new bag of flavors called “Late Night Taco Truck” and, while I can’t wait to try the Churro and the Margarita flavors, I threw up in my mouth a little when I read the words “Beef Taco Jelly Bean.” Flavors also include Horchata, Salsa, and Guacamole. Which do you think is the worst??
A California bear named Hank the Tank was accused of breaking into people’s homes and eating everything within reach because he is HANKGRY! LOL!!! [Hank was later vindicated when DNA evidence proved he was actually not one but THREE separate bears!]
Saturday Night Live Highlights — John Mullaney
Sue me, I’m a week behind! Very excited to get to the Oscar “Something For Everyone” Isaac episode, but this weekend I caught up on John Mullaney’s, and here’s what I loved and hated.
Highlights: (1) The cold open was replaced by the Ukrainian Chorus Dumka of New York performing Prayer for Ukraine, (2) The Monologue, which led me to remember that John Mulaney is a national treasure even though he left his wife for Olivia Munn, (3) The Monkey Trial started off so suspect and turned out so funny, (4) Covid Dinner Discussion skewered all of us, and (5) Subway Churro started off bumpy and maybe racist but turned out pretty damn funny (and not racist) if you’re a New Yorker or have ever ridden the subway and/or seen a musical.
Lowlights: Must I say it again? Michael Che disrespecting women (and in this case, Eastern European women) isn’t funny. Go figure!
Reality TV — The Courtship on NBC!
Okay, I am STILL WATCHING Love is Blind and I stan Natalie and Deepti and think that Shayne (Shaine? Shane?) is actually a Golden Retriever in a man’s body caught in some kind of reverse Shaggy Dog situation. BUT—If you finished Love is Blind and need your next dating show—May I convince you to embark with me on the folly that is The Courtship on NBC!
This show came outta NOWHERE into my feed and, as someone who very unpopularly does NOT like The Bachelor franchise, I am suddenly ALL IN.
It’s basically The Bachelorette meets Bridgerton. A hot, single woman named Nicole Rémy is the bachelorette and a whole group of men are competing to win her love. The twist? The whole thing is set in a Regency-era mansion in the British countryside and they have to dress in Regency costumes and follow Regency etiquette! They say things like, “Handsome! Very educated!” They bow! They dance (poorly!)! They incorrectly quote Jane Austen! I love it!
The show also posits that “modern dating” has failed Nicole so she’s willing to try the “courtship model,” which includes having her parents, best friend, and sister along as “the court.” This is a fun addition, but I must say as a former homeschooler — Watch out, girl! Courtship is a slippery slope to waking up and finding suddenly you have 12 children, several cows, and a monthly payment on an Arkansas farm! [Which is fine if that’s your thing, I guess.]
A few takeaways from the first episode, which aired Sunday on NBC, but I watched today (Monday) on Peacock:
Excuse me for living but the people are way hotter on this show than The Bachelorette?? And they are also from “around the world,” though it seems like mostly America, Canada, Italy, and the UK.
The fact that they have to call her Miss Rémy is chef’s kiss perfection. Men should be made to do this in the 21st century.
The man with the unicorn lapel shed actual tears. He is definitely in this for the acting career!
The dance scenes are NOT as elegant as in the movies. Imagine Keira Knightley huffing and puffing her way through a dance dialogue! “I am… *gasping for breath* telling you….*breathing heavily* … that I am taking you seriously… *breathing heavily*…. and I will prove it to you *stumbles over feet*…”
Last of all: Miss Rémy does not suffer fools!! You go girl!
Mondays are now my night for PERIOD DRAMA — The Courtship straight into a new episode of The Gilded Age which, by the way, I am no longer hate-watching, but LOVE-WATCHING.
Expect more from me on this.
Movies — Flee in theaters and on Hulu
We continue our Oscars coverage with the groundbreaking Oscar-nominated film Flee, a true story about a refugee fleeing Afghanistan. It received three Oscar nominations: Best Animated Feature, Best Documentary Feature, and International Feature Film.
When Bong Joon-ho, director of Parasite/one of the greatest directors alive, calls something “the most moving piece of cinema I saw this year,” you sit up straight, find the nearest Kleenex box, and watch the damn thing. (See his full letter here.) I, too, recommend that you run, not walk, to see this film!
I normally would never be drawn to a movie like Flee — and by that I mean a movie that’s almost entirely animated (!!). Normally Ben has to cajole me into watching animated films because they are, and I’m quoting myself here, “SO BORING.”
[But then I cry my eyes out in Frozen 2, so honestly it’s just a mental block and not accurate at all. I mean, we all know the best/only good part of Harry Potter Movie 7.1 is the animated Tale of the Three Brothers.]
In Flee, the filmmakers intersperse documentary-style film clips with animated reenactments of what the narrator is explaining about his life. They do this to protect the identity of the real people involved. While it took me a little while to get into it, the format somehow allows you to put yourself into the story more completely — to emotionally and imaginatively connect with its main character, Amin.
The news is heavy this month, and this movie is heavy, too. But it’s also exquisite and, I might even say, necessary.
Brief thoughts on The Power of the Dog on Netflix
I also watched The Power of the Dog, which was nominated for Best Picture and is a favorite to win. My one-sentence review: “Dusty film that thinks it’s about gay identity but really is about how Gen Z should not be f***ed with.”
It was overall stunningly beautiful but left me a bit cold. Benedict Cumberbatch and Kodi Smit-McPhee were great and it’s certainly valuable as a challenge to the American myth of masculine domination, but didn’t feel as revolutionary as it thinks it is? [I found an article that agrees with me!]
I would love to hear your opinions if you’ve seen it because maybe I’m just not cut out for Westerns and/or slow movies?
I’d say if you want a fun Western try The Harder They Fall and if you want a transformative film about queer identity and toxic masculinity try Moonlight.
That’s all for this week, folks! I would love to hear what you’ve been watching, reading, or listening to — and your thoughts and opinions on everything above!
P.S. Some Posts on Ukraine
I think we’re all struggling to different degrees with how to carry on, engage with the world, stay mentally healthy, and help. It’s hard to feel like we can enjoy our lives while also acknowledging the devastation happening around us.
In this little corner, as always, we will try to do both. Here are a few things that are reminding me of the good, and giving me the energy to keep engaging:
Pianist playing “What a Wonderful World” outside the Lviv train station.
“We Lived Happily During the War” by Ukrainian-American poet Ilya Kaminsky — a reflection on the indescribable feelings of stasis, guilt, relief, and cognitive dissonance while living through a war from a safe distance.
Airbnb users have raised nearly $2 million “renting” [but not visiting] homes in Ukraine to get cash directly to Ukrainian people.
Love to all of you. Thanks for being here. 💜
Ok, I cannot STAN the Courtship show thingum but I’m still your biggest fan. But you will also have to explain why da h*ck you are now love-watching The Gilded Age and if I should actually invest???!?!?
I cannot BELIEVE you saw the Music Man already! I have tickets for August. I say that the whole point is that Harold Hill can’t sing. He just has to be charismatic, which Hugh Jackman is, no?