"We are so back." -Me and Recession TV
Why everyone is watching the 'The Pitt'!
Plus: The drama over the new Snow White, the Beatles movie(s) casting, George Clooney swears off romance, the “Morning Routine Guy,” three fantastic things to stream right now and one movie I couldn’t even finish.
Greetings from a woman fresh off a trip to Kid Disneyland [Disneyland] and Grown-up Disneyland [Las Vegas]! As someone who loves spectacle, glitter, being wowed, gasping, making a thing out of a thing, and generally overreacting, I had the time of my life and lost my voice!
Everything at Disney is simultaneously so inconvenient [walking, standing in lines, trying not to lose children] and yet so convenient [queueing in an orderly manner! smiling employees telling you what to do and how!]. Is this what it feels like to live in Germany? Everything just works?
My favorite part was how real Star Wars Land felt and holding onto my niece and nephews for dear life on the Tower of Terror Guardians of the Galaxy — Mission: Breakout!
Anyways, it was a beautiful trip loaded up with family and topped off by one of the busiest seasons in my work calendar — March Madness. I did not have “Do an interview on CBS from a closet in Disney’s Grand Californian Hotel & Spa business center next to a teenager finishing a school project” on my 2025 bingo card, but here we are!
Let’s get into this week’s topics! As always, this is designed for you to scan and find the things you’re interested in — but I also hope that those of you with the time for a close read will find yourselves on a good ride.
But FIRST: My question for you this week. Disneyland: Yes or no?
In the News*
The Snow White drama.
Speaking of Disney… The new Snow White movie is flopping to the tune of a $115 million loss, but to me, the embarrassing thing is that a bunch of grown-ass Disney execs are trying to pin their failure on the little baby 23-year-old star at its center, Rachel Zegler.
How it started: If you have ever logged onto the internet, you can guess how a racist corner of social media responded when a talented Latina, Zegler, was cast as “Snow White.” Badly.
Some other unsavory folks, whom I can only assume were beamed onto the internet from Olden Times, got mad that Disney rewrote the story to be less, I guess, 1937-gender-roles-coded? But when Zegler mentioned that the original could use some updating — a thing most of us have observed MANY TIMES — everyone piled onto her as if that was her idea? Honey, the concept that Disney Princesses are aging poorly as role models is almost as old as Disney itself! Lily James said the same things about Cinderella and Emma Watson said the same things about Belle, but the rage-machine stayed silent then….?
Two other things that may have helped tank this movie: The stars, Rachel Zegler and Gal Gadot [an objectively bad actress], are vocally on opposite sides of the Israel-Palestine conflict. And, on a totally separate topic, Disney cast and recast the “dwarfs” to try to make everyone happy and not offended, and ended up with this CGI nightmare fuel.
In conclusion: Disney just made a bad movie, a garish hellscape I have dubbed Cirque du Sol-A.I.! Then, instead of admitting that some projects fail and that their live-action remakes are all bombing, Disney tried to blame Snow White’s very young star, in the process making her a lightning rod for the “culture wars.” Please. Is she a little bit annoying? Sure! But if being annoying and opinionated tanked movies, Tom Cruise would not have a career!2
Anyways, I won’t be seeing it because I dislike all the live-action remakes, but I hope that poor young woman is doing OK. [This week, our father, Pedro Pascal, posted in support of her, so I think she’ll be fine.]
The Beatles movie project has a cast!!
Director Sam Mendes [1917, Skyfall, Spectre, Away We Go, American Beauty] is tackling the story of The Beatles in four separate movies, each from the perspective of one Beatle.
Paul McCartney will be played by Paul Mescal, Internet Boyfriend No. 1 and short-shorts icon of Gladiator-II and several-tragic-British-movies fame.
John Lennon: Harris Dickinson, Internet Boyfriend No. 2 and star of that age-gap, not-as-scandalous-as-it-thought-it-was movie with Nicole Kidman.
George Harrison: Joseph Quinn, the emo boy from Stranger Things and now rising star in the new Quiet Place and also Gladiator II! [More on Gladiator II later.]
Ringo Starr: Barry Keoghan, Sabrina Carpenter’s ex, whose effigy she and Dolly Parton stashed in the bed of a pickup truck. Oh, also, star of a couple movies I loved: Banshees of Inisherin and Saltburn.
I’m thrilled! Let’s hear your thoughts!
George Clooney says he is officially retiring from doing romance (movies).
“I’m 63 years old,” he says, and, “not trying to compete with 25-year-old leading men.” Cut to all the 25-year-old leading men screaming, crying, throwing up with relief! This is philanthropy.
Have you heard about the Morning Routine guy?
Earlier this month, the account “Tips For Men” [already lol] went viral after sharing a fitness influencer’s morning routine, which starts at 3:50 a.m. (!) and follows him doing things like putting his face in a bowl of ice water (!?) and rubbing a banana peel on his forehead (!!!). [And now there’s a nighttime routine!!]
The entire internet has given this video the derision it deserves, so I’ll just say one nice thing: The last development I expected in 2025 was a ripped, Bible-thumping, banana-peel-skincare-peddling, Saratoga-water-drinking, self-helping toxic-positivity fitness guru who wakes up at 3:45 a.m. to become the hero that I, a nighttime-nose-strip-mouth-guard-wearing person, desperately needed? I mean, if HE does it … it’s sexy!?
Everyone Is Watching The Pitt
I am fully binging, fully dreaming about, fully in a parasocial relationship with the characters in, The Pitt.
What is the show? Honestly, it’s just a medical drama. But when I say “just,” I mean the way Magnolia Bakery’s banana pudding is “just” banana pudding. Or the way a Krispy Kreme donut when the “Hot Now” sign is on is “just” a donut. Something in the way the ingredients came together, or the just-right timing, makes it different.
Why it has its hooks in me: So much TV today is bad because creators are designing for a modern audience who watch while scrolling their phones. Netflix has openly admitted that it designs shows to be a second-screen experience. Well, The Pitt isn’t on Netflix, it’s on HBO; and HBO is doing whatever the opposite of a second-screen strategy is. I cannot look at my phone for a single second lest I miss a moment of Dr. Zaddy Robby dispensing sturdy commands while Bryan Cranston’s daughter frantically slices open someone’s esophagus!!!
My friend Adam DM’ed me, “It’s like 15hrs of The Bear S1E7 intensity.”3
Am I queasy, woozy, not understanding a medical word they say, dry-heaving the entire time? Yes! But remember that feeling of being so locked into a TV show that you forget you even have a phone or a job or bills or a family?
A caveat that’s not a caveat: If you think it looks like a Boomer show, you’re kinda right. But if you conclude that only Boomers are watching it, you couldn’t be more wrong. Now that Severance is over, this is the new monoculture. Everybody is watching The Pitt. And by “everybody,” I don’t mean 100 percent of people, I mean “people from every walk of life and political or religious or dietary persuasion.” My friend Becky’s conservative parents who are both retired army nurses + my favorite pop culture writer who is a free-Palestine progressive 🤝 Obsessed with The Pitt.
It’s very network-TV vibes, by which I snobbishly mean it’s easy to follow, basic, and not trying to do anything that requires a thesis in literature to understand. But it’s really well done, and there’s something comforting about the predictable line readings, recognizable character tropes, and strong core of moral courage.
In short, it’s Good Old-Fashioned Television. And as we all bandy jokes about recession pop and “We’re so back (2008),” it makes sense that a show this good, that also happens to tap our nostalgia for the way TV used to be, is making such waves. It’s like “ER” or “The West Wing” are still on and nothing else happened in the world.
And zaddy Dr. Noah Wyle will make it all OK.
What Else Is On My To-Watch List Lately?
Three things that are great and one that I hated….
The Studio on Apple TV+: Seth Rogen’s new comedy about Hollywood. It’s basically like watching a satire about how Snow White got made botched. I’ve only seen the pilot but it had me screaming and exclaiming. Bryan Cranston, Catherine O’Hara, Kathryn Hahn, and more. Reviews say it’s the must-see comedy of the year!
White Lotus Season 3 finale!! THIS SUNDAY! People are up and down on this installment, but I find it White Lotus-y and delightful. It’s Ben’s favorite season! [I still think Season 1 is peerlessly excruciating, but I might like this season more than the second.] Let’s admit: Not much has happened other than character actors doing their character-acting THING, which I could watch all day. If they can stick the landing, it’ll be an instant classic.
One of Them Days is finally out on Netflix! This film stars my favorite person in Hollywood, Keke Palmer, and SZA, and was produced by Issa Rae. 10/10 excited to finally watch it!
Bad: I finally tried to watch Gladiator II on a plane and Ben said he’d never seen me look so pissed off in my life. The most boring opening 20 minutes of a film I’ve EVER! SEEN! Don’t waste my time, even if you’re Ridley Scott!!! I took a photo of the opening script so you could get an idea of just how lazy the writing is:
That’s all for this week, folks! A doozy as always, thank you for being here! I’d love to hear your thoughts and opinions in the comments — or drop a 💜 to let me know you enjoyed!
Listen, if I’m being honest, the biggest “news” floating around in my brain are Tiger Woods dating Donald Trump Jr.’s ex-wife [who has ALSO dated a drug kingpin, a Saudi Prince loosely connected to Al Qaeda, and … Leo DiCaprio?? She HAS to be CIA???] and the fact that Sydney Sweeney just broke off her engagement and everyone on the internet is shipping her and Glen Powell. [Which, for the record, I am not shipping them because I hated that movie they were in together and thought they had zero chemistry, although good height match.] But, anyways, as I have said on here MANY TIMES, I try to leave people’s love lives mostly out of the conversation so that if I one day become famous I have grounds to say, “STAY OUT OF MY LIFE,” or if I one day become besties with Sydney Sweeney, I don’t have to have THAT conversation. I’m playing the long game here, folks!
I can only imagine how annoying I was at 23! May he who was not annoying at 23 cast the first stone!
The way people who have worked in restaurants say The Bear is true to life, people who have worked in hospitals say The Pitt is true to life.
Disneyland is always a Yes between January and May, especially early January when you can catch holiday lights still up! :-) Otherwise, you need to spend L-A-R-G-E sums of money to attend.
I’ll tell Glenn you said hi 😂